Sarah Belawski found the perfect apartment, a quaint two bedroom flat on the top floor in mid-town Albany. She and her girlfriend Beth Gannon decided to celebrate the move by hosting a housewarming party and inviting some of her closest friends.
Sarah put a lot of time into preparing the festivities. She purchased a variety of drinks, hired a bartender, and made a spread of hor d’oeuvres including her popular dip. Sarah introduced her guests, and spent time conversing with everyone at the affair as snow speckled the night sky. She felt at home in the company of her friends, but in the back of her mind she worried if a new lease would be offered when hers expired in six months.
Sarah worried about the future of her living arrangement not because of potential problems with her neighbors, rent disputes, or the other run of the mill problems one may encounter when leasing. She worried about her situation because of her gender identity. Belawski is a transgender female and was going through the process of updating her license to reflect the gender identity she considers herself. She knew this identity could lead to potential problems with her landlord.
However, she knew if a problem arose, the Albany County legal system would be on her side. Additionally, Belawski was up to speed on gender rights issues, and willing to take action to protect herself.
“I knew if he retracted the lease, I had legal protection,” said Belawski, “but if the same thing happened a few miles away, I would have had trouble with it.”
Albany County has laws that protect people from discrimination based on sexual identity. However, there are no such laws at the state level in New York. Laws offering protection for sexual and gender identity are determined by county, and there are still many that do not recognize this as grounds for discrimination.
Belawski is hopeful that the Gender Expression Non-Discrimination Act (GENDA) will be passed in New York. The bill, if enacted into law, would provide anti-discrimination protection for people of all gender identities in the workplace, public, and at home.
“If the bill passes, I don’t have to limit myself to where I live,” said Belawski, “a statewide law would mean I don’t have to worry about it either.”
Belawski thinks the United States may be a few steps closer to offering protection from discrimination.
“Last week at the Federal level, the Matthew Shepard Law was passed,” said Belawski, “it’s a step in the right direction.”
The Matthew Shepard Law was passed to protect people of all gender identities from hate crimes. But there is still no federal laws in the United States to protect people from discrimination based on gender identity. Belawski realizes that gender identity is a basis for discrimination in the workplace nationwide and there will continue to be if a law is not enacted.
“I work in a place where it’s not an issue,” said Belawski, an employee at the New York State Department of Labor, “but it’s not that way for many people.”
Non-discrimination rules in the workplace are offered at the discretion of the company.
“I read somewhere that 85 percent of Fortune 500 companies have non-discrimination rules,” said Belawski, “but Mobil refuses to have any such rules. So many gays and transgender people have started to boycott Mobil and shop accordingly.”
These issues became a concern for Belawski prior to beginning hormone treatment 14 months ago. She came out openly as a transgender female a few months later. In that time, she filed paperwork to reflect her new self.
“It’s a long process to change the information on an ID,” said Belawski, “there’s a lot of paperwork and it’s quite expensive.”
The paperwork to obtain a new identification card presented a challenge, but being asked to present her ID created a fear within.
“I hoped I would not be in a situation where I had to show my ID,” said Belawski, “When my ID still said that I was Tom and a male, I was denied from places including stores and clubs.”
Sarah’s girlfriend Beth Gannon is also a transgender female. Gannon has experienced some hardships since her own transition in 2004.
“Early in my transition, I was harassed in stores and out on the streets,” said Gannon, “Things were also dicey with my parents for a while.”
Gannon also has had trouble when it comes to presenting her identification card.
“I catch static occasionally,” said Gannon, “I haven’t had my license changed. So there have been a few instances of issues. Nothing major, which I am really fortunate for. I have never been put in any dangerous situations.”
Presenting one’s ID are not the only uncomfortable situations experienced .
“If I use a men’s room, strangers inform me that I’m a faggot,” said Belawski, “if I use a women’s room, then I’m told I don’t belong there.”
Belawski was relieved that her employers tried to make the bathroom situation less of a hassle.
“There were two men’s bathrooms and one women’s bathroom at my office,” said Belawski, “So my employer made one of the rest rooms a unisex bathroom, which was very accommodating.”
But there still remains some issues with the bathroom.
“In the entire time since they have created a unisex bathroom, I’ve only seen four or five women use it,” said Belawski, “otherwise, it has been all males.”
Belawski was touched by the story of a speaker at a conference who had a much more difficult bathroom situation at work.
“The individual was not allowed to use the bathroom in the building and had to find a restroom elsewhere,” said Belawski, “they had to leave their place of work to go find a bathroom… Ridiculous.”
Belawski decided that it was important to inform people and encourage them to accept people of all gender identities to prevent such situations. She began calling congressmen to ask them to support measures to ensure anti-discrimination laws and legalized marriage for gays, lesbians, and transgender people. She urged her friends to pick up the phone and follow her lead.
“I’m not that active myself,” said Gannon, “but someone certainly has to do it. She looks at the information available on the table and finds out who can be called about the issue. She actively volunteers herself. I’m very proud of Sarah for the role she has taken.”
Belawski also took an active role by volunteering at the Capital District Gay and Lesbian Community Center (CDGLCC). But she also found some irony at the community center.
“Notice the lack of ‘T’ in that name,” said Belawski, “LGBT: the ‘T’ is silent.”
That aside, Belawski feels it’s important to have a role at the CDGLCC.
“Because we all get shit on, we all have to pull together,” said Belawski.
There have been a number of times where Belawski has felt she was “shit on.”
“I lost my best friend,” said Belawski, “She was a woman with strong views on what it means to be a woman. She was a first wave feminist who felt I perpetuated negative stereotypes of women.” She felt that transgender people who identify as female created an artificial parody of women.”
The situation proved to be difficult.
“I made the choice to stand up for myself,” said Belawski, “I had to say what you are saying is dehumanizing and wrong. It was the hardest part of my transition to lose such a close friend.”
Belawski never felt that becoming a woman was based on women’s rights issues.
“It wasn’t a decision to become a female,” said Belawski, “It was to try and stop being a male.”
The decision was to live the rest of her life as a female had created a longstanding conflict within Belawski.
“I knew for a long time that I was unhappy as a male, about 12 to 13 years,” said Belawski.
The decision to became a woman became easier after a few important encounters.
“The catalyst came when I met other trans-women,” said Belawski, “the media portrayal was wrong. It took actually meeting other trans-women to realize this. I realized that I can live my life as a trans and not be crazy. I could be normal.”
Belawski was concerned that her family might take the news in a similar fashion as her one-time friend. But she was relieved to find out that they were much more supportive.
“My family took the news surprisingly well,” said Belawski, “I first came out to my sister. I told her face-to-face, and she was fine with it.”
Belawski took a different approach to inform her father. She wrote him a letter.
“I had a lot of fear coming out to my father,” said Belawski, “he had a tough time with it. But he has grown to accept it.”
She had a tougher time breaking the news to her grandparents.
“They had the toughest time dealing with it,” said Belawski.
By telling her family members about her transition noticed a theme.
“My sister, who is of my generation had no problems with it. My father had a tough time, but he accepts it. My grandparents still have a hard time with it,” said Belawski, “I think it’s reflective of the generations. But on the positive side, it shows that the younger generations are beginning to accept transgender people more and more.”
Belawski’s sentiment is evidenced by a situation experienced by the child of an ex-girlfriend.
“Her child came out as trans at the age of 13,” said Belawski, “I think that is amazing, and reflective of changes of the time.”
Belawski hopes that people continue to become more accepting of transgender people. This gives her hope that the GENDA bill will be passed in New York and that the United States will some day take action against discrimination towards people of all gender identities.
“It’s about equity, not equality,” said Belawski.
Sarah Belawski of Albany, NY is an active against discrimination towards transgender people.
No comments:
Post a Comment